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In The Mirror
"Eyes front," Laura heard, "concentrate on what you see in the reflection of the mirror."
Both she and Cathy had been out of quarantine for at least a week, but keeping track of time was difficult. The schedule had been stringent. Get up when lights come on, eat when fed, shower and clean up when allowed, exercise when ordered, and always the lessons. So far there had been lectures or interactive sessions, like seminars. The mix of students in the classrooms changed constantly though she did see Cathy frequently. At the end of they day they were divided up, apparently at random, and taken to cells to sleep. At least there was time to relax and talk with whomever was in the group for the evening. Until lights out, or rather dimmed. Then it was no talking and go right to sleep.
The first day it seemed impossible to tolerate. The second day was a struggle to make it through without breaking down. But Laura adapted. She still had to watch herself and try to remember what seemed to be an endless list of rules, prohibitions and requirements. What had been a conscious effort seemed to happen by habit now. Laura found herself looking forward to the daily lessons, and the quiet time afterward when they could sit and talk. There were hardships, but she shared them with everyone else. Even the teachers, who presumably were at the school voluntarily, had to keep to the same regimen as the involuntary attendees. Laura suspected that in the staff area life might return to something like normal for them, but there was no way to know. Asking was forbidden, and the teachers never talked about it.
The high point of her day was being granted permission to take a shower. Not so much because the warm water felt so good but that for a few brief moments she was freed from the intimate confinement of the belt. Like the rest Laura was tempted in that short few minutes to seek relief by touching herself, but during showers the teachers were stationed everywhere and always watching. It had been made very clear on the first day that anyone making the attempt would simply lose her shower privileges. Fear outweighed desire, in Laura and the rest, for no one ever tried.
This morning had not been routine. Instead of breakfast and a shower, they had been taken directly to a long narrow room. One entire wall was covered in tiled mirrors. On the floor in front were mats. One by one they were assigned a spot and told to kneel facing the mirror. Cathy was to Laura's right. Laura started to look a question, hoping Cathy could give her some idea if this was going to be a complicated lesson, but on hearing the command from one of the teachers she immediately turned to face the mirror. That was unusual, Laura thought, generally there weren't more than one or two teachers in a class, today she could count at least five by their reflections.
"Your master works himself to death to support you. He lies awake at night worrying about you, trying to decide what's best for you with little regard for himself. He would risk his life to protect you, and not even question the danger to himself. Every moment of the day he thinks about you, constantly reviewing everything he does, looking for things he forgot, signs you might be unhappy, making sure he lives up to his own standards about how you should be treated." The teacher lecturing was someone Laura hadn't seen before. From the way the other teachers seemed to defer to her it was apparent she was one of the senior staff.
"All of you are some of the most fortunate women on earth. You have found someone who is dedicated to giving you the best life he possibly can. Does he want your gratitude for all this?" The teacher's tone was abrupt.
"No! Don't thank him; he doesn't want to hear it. What he wants, in very simple terms, is you . All of you, not what you see in front of you in the mirror. He desires your body, but even more he needs what is inside each of you, to take hold of your mind and spirit.. He lives to possess all of you. Now, you will stare into the mirror in front of you, and you will tell him, silently, what he wants to know, that he owns you. He has an unbreakable hold on you. A hold you cannot break away from, a hold you don't want to end."
Laura watched out of the corner of her eye as the woman walked back and forth, scrutinizing all of them. She stopped behind Cathy, staring intently at both Laura's and Cathy's reflection. "Eyes on yourself, girl" she admonished Laura. Cathy didn't escape the teacher's sharp eye either. "And you, pull those shoulders back. Make him look at you. Grab his attention, don't take it for granted." Cathy did, forcing her breasts out. "You were born with everything you need to catch his eye. Use it, and don't be ashamed to flaunt it. This isn't a stranger in front of you, so don't hold back."
Everyone in the line came in for some kind of criticism. The teachers patrolled back and forth behind them constantly, looking for any sign of inattention. Laura stared at her reflection, picturing Frank sitting in front of her, looking down at her kneeling at his feet. She stared at her reflection, imagining him looking at her. The collar around her neck gleamed in the light. She lifted her chin slightly, thinking to draw his attention to it.
"My job," the head teacher continued, "is to instruct all of you on how to communicate. Not with words, but in the way you present yourself to him and the world. Don't ever underestimate his powers of observation. He sees everything. It may not make a conscious impression, not right away, but everything you say and do goes into the back of his mind. It rolls around in there, mixes together, and out of it comes his impression of how well he's doing. What you have to do is make sure that impression is the right one.
"He has his pride. That pride comes from his image of himself, whether or not he's living up to his own standards. He's no sociopath, born without a conscience. He cares, about you, about your problems, and about doing a good job. He wants you, on his terms and never doubt that, but he has to know you are getting everything you want and need too. That's why you are looking at your reflection. You have to learn to see yourself as he sees you."
What does Frank see when he looks at me? Laura wondered to herself, does he know how much I really do love him?
Cathy knelt next to Laura, lost in her own reverie. The image in the mirror was familiar to her. Robert didn't know it, but when she was home alone she still faced herself in the bedroom mirror doing the same thing as now. They had been together long enough for her to learn what he liked. She tuned out the teacher's lecture and thought about his instructions to her.
No one must know the real reason she was here. If she was too perfect there would be suspicions. Already she had heard veiled remarks about not belonging with the rest of the group. She had to do something, but what kind of mistake would be reasonable for her? It had to be believable, but not overboard. She thought about the last time at the school, when she had lost her temper. If they took her away then she would lose contact with Laura. But if it were so minor as to be overlooked then there would be no point.
Robert had sent her to the school on the pretense of having a bad attitude. Disobedience and backtalk, that's how she would define it. So whatever she did had to incorporate those problem areas, but in a passive way. An idea began to take shape.
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