Fancy Farts

                                                          Fancy Farts

 

Fresh out of school, I submitted applications and resumes all over town and

became used to the phrase. "I'm sorry, you're not quite what we're looking for."

 

I had exausted my most promising options and nearly given up when I got a call from 'Avila's Fashions.' I was to meet with Avila herself. I had seen photos of her and could not pass on the opportunity to meet her. Though only thirty something she was already regarded as a creative genius and astute business woman. I had no expectations of getting the job because I felt she would be thinking, "What could this wanker possibly know about women's clothing."

 Surprisingly, she said that I needed to know nothing about her business but to just keep the accounts straight. As the owner and CEO of the company she demanded that I would report only to her.

 

  knew, at our first meeting, that I would accept any job she offered me. I was immediately so smitten by her beauty and demeanor that I was eager to attend to any task she desired.

 

I was happy to have a job but, mostly, I just relished working for Avila. She was, for me, the epitome of feminine power and beauty. She would glide into my tiny office, strut around the room and quiz me about financial details. When I stuttered it was not because I didn't know the answer. I was just fascinated by her.

 

She had a firm but curvacious body and long auburn hair. She wore the most exquisite suits with short tight skirts and stylish jackets. With her heels, she stood at  least four inches above me. I immediately fell in love with her full voluptuous ass in those snug designer skirts. Her bottom was spectacular. She often caught me staring at her prominent globes but would only let me know by a sly smile or raised eyebrow.

 

II began to work late into the night to assure that my meetings with her would go well. Just seeing her up close was a treat and, if she praised my work, it totally made my day. Her image began to fill my dreams and I would jerk myself off just thinking of the last time I saw her.

 

I had been with 'Avila' for about three months when our relationship changed. My boss, whose image I conjured everytime I masturbated, barged into my tiny office and stood before me with her hands on her hips. She was dressed in a short white skirt with a red blouse and matching red pumps. Her luxurious hair spilled about her shoulders.  

 

"Bobby, I need the Simpson file ASAP." 

 

II just sat there with my eyes wide and my mouth open.

 

"Oh, never mind, she said, I'll get it myself."

 

With that, she bent from the waist and began to search through the hardcopy files. Wow!  Her skirt was so short that I was now viewing the ass of my dreams. Her sheer panties only made the vision more exciting.Time stood still for me as her adorable ass filled my vision. Suddenly there was a loud noise and Avila stood and turned toward me. She struck a coy pose with a finger to her lips and said, "OOPs, sorry Bobby, I had a sushi lunch today."

I hope my fart didn't offend you."

 

My cock was already nearly erect and jumped to fullness at her words.

I must have turned ten shades of red as her steady gaze let me know that she was well aware that I had been ogleing her ass.

She walked around my desk, raised her leg and placed her heel right between my  thighs. I remained speechless wishing I could hide my erection. She rubbed the toe of her pump along the obvious bulge in my trousers.

 

""My fart didn't offend you at all, did it?"

"In fact, I think you love my ass."

"I've seen you looking at it often enough."

"Just thinking of it makes you hard, doesn't it?"

"Show me your cock, Bobby."

 

 She was both my boss and the woman of my fantasies so I eagerly undid my zip and exposed myself to her.

 

""I thought so, she said, I'll bet you've never had a bigger boner in your life."

"You know, Bobby, my sushi farts tend to last a while and I feel another coming real

soon."  "Would you like to savor one up close?"

:"Just kneel right there."

 

I went to my knees as she settled her silky ass right on my still blushing face and let her skirt fall around my head. She had clearly been holding back. I didn't know women could fart like that. Most of her expulsions were soft and silent but a few were quite blatant and as noisy as the first. She giggled and wiggled as she rubbed the smooth fabric of her panties over my face for at least ten minutes .

 

Finally, she said, "Bobby, I'm feeling a little moist back there."

"Could you just pull my panty aside and lick around a bit?"

"I don't want to soil my skirt."

 

I did it and I'm not sorry. I pulled the leg of her panties aside and kissed her ass. She seemed to like that so I slid my tongue between her ass cheeks and licked toward her dark flower. She qiggled again, rose from my face, smiled and smoothed her skirt.

 

"That was nice, Bobby, you can put your cock away now but don't go playing with it."  "I now consider it mine and I don't want you to abuse it."

 

She turned gracefully on her heels and looked over her shoulder at me as she spoke. 'I'll need a full spreadsheet of the Simpson account by noon tomorrow."

 

She strutted out of the room leaving me on my knees with, as she had said, the biggest and most painful erection of my life. I really wanted to come but my desire to please Avila was greater. I worked late again and delivered  the document as soon as she got to her office the next morning.

 

"This looks good, Bobby."

"I rather enjoyed our private time yesterday."

 "Would you like to play a little game with me?"

 

Even my loose khakis could not conceal my inevitable answer. "Sure, Ms. Avila."

 

""Good, she said, the game is called 'guess what I had for breakfast."

"Still want to play?"

I said that I did and was ordered beneath her skirt while she scanned my work and released her glorious gas onto my face. There was no real physical contact that day and my guess was wrong but this little game became a regular aspect of our conferences.

 

Sometimes I did guess correctly. Once it was when she had ingested a Western Omlet for her morning meal. The next was when she had eaten only fruit and cereal. Her diet definately affected the taste of her farts but, by now, she could have eaten roadkill and I still would have kissed her ass. When I guessed correctly she would have me expose my cock to her. At first she would just use her sexy heels to toy with it. Later, she would pet it softly as she kissed me and whispered in my ear.

 

"Mmmm, Oh yes,"

"That's a nice full rod, Bobby, and I want you to save it all for me."

"Don't ever play with your cock unless I give permission."

"Be a good boy for me."

 

 She would then rub her ass on my face leaving me bulging and blueballed.

 One time she expressed some concern about residual moistness as her suits were very expensive. I began to carry a silk handkerchief so I could insure that there would be no tell tale evidence that she had ever farted or that I had licked her ass by gently swabbing her anal crevice after our kinky games.

 

On one Friday most everyone had gone when she called me to join her in her office. She had me undress and stand naked before her. She reached out and held my balls in her hand. She gave a little squeeze and then another that was harder and made me wince.

She told me to lock the door and wheeled her chair from behind her desk. She was completely nude below her waist but still wearing her blouse and jacket.

 

."Mmmm, you have been a good boy, haven't you?"

 "Your balls are very full."

"Have you been thinking of me, Bobby?"

 

I admitted that I had  thought of little else for the past few weeks but had not cum since she told me not to.

My comment brought forth that coy smirk of a smile which suited her so well.

With a final grasp of my nuts she settled back in her chair and ordered me to my knees.

 

"Bobby, I had the most delicious fajitas today."

"I want to share."

"Come and pleasure me." 

"I want to try something new.

 

This was the first time I had seen her classy cunny and it was as beautiful as I had often imagined. She retained her sexy smile as I knelt between her legs for a closer look. The sleek pink lips of her pussy were nestled within her neatly trimmed pubes. I kissed them gently, at first, and then slowly licked her dewy nether lips until I heard her moan. My  tongue went deeper until she pressed hard against my mouth and began a rhythmic fucking motion against my face. The tip of my tongue found her clit. She sighed deeply, gasped and held me tight to her cunt as she mouthed every nasty word I had ever heard and some I hadn't. The cream of her passion filled my mouth as her full thighs pressed hard against my face.

Finally she relaxed and I started to rise but she got to her feet first and turned around.

 

"That was wonderful, Bobby, but we're not quite finished. Are we?"

 

No, we were not. I kissed her devine bottom until she parted her globes for me.

With very ladylike grace she expelled more gaseous evidence of her spicy lunch into my face and mouth. I laved the curves of her ass, massaged her bounteous bottom and advanced my tongue toward her musky anal portal.

 

As I sniffed and licked her bumhole she began to finger her clit, stepped out of her panties and encouraged me to stroke my cock with them. This seemed to excite her as she watched me slide the sexy garment over my erection. I liked it too and pushed my tongue deeper into her ass.  She climaxed very soon and rose from my face.  Her crimson lips were parted as she watched me cream her panties with the last surge of my orgasm. I was still licking all about my mouth searching for every trace of her when she pulled on  my hair and bid me to stand.

 

She then sat behind her desk and poured us both a drink from a bottle in her drawer. We each had a cigarette with our Jamesons and had our first real conversation. She told me I had a clever tongue and seemed to love working for her. I told her that she knew me all too well, that I loved my job and had been jerking off for months just thinking of her.

 

Avila expressed appreciation for my hard work and devotion but stressed that all my efforts would never change the fact that she was my boss and superior. I reached for her hand and brought it to my lips. I kissed her fingertips and said I liked it that way. I was rewarded with another of her special smiles.

.

She told me her panties were Pfiffs and that I had just soiled some very expensive lingerie. I vowed to replace them and would love shopping for her.

 

Most guys will admit that there is a little thrill when we are forced into the malls on those special days to find something worthy of our ladies. Pfiff lingerie was only available online but when the package arrived I opened it and placed a long strand of pearls right on top of her new sexy undies and resealed the box with a bright red ribbon and a card professing my love and respect for her.

(I offered it to her at our next meeting. 

She said I was sweet, kissed me and sent me back to work.

 

For the next two weeks she was cordial but very businesslike. She largely avoided me so I began to send her flowers. Victoria's Secret became my second home and I spent every spare penny on lacy confections that I would package nicely and leave in her office. When we passed during the day I tried to discern the look she gave me. It was a look of interest but with an aspect of haughtiness that said, "Do you really think you're worthy of ME."

 

I did not but I had to try. After many gifts and weeks of relentless fawning Avila began to notice me again.    

 

It was on another Friday when she invited me to her home and we had a long talk about our 'relationship'.  I learned that she was of Greek ancestry and knew a lot about Hellenic culture. She told me of 'Venus Kallipygos' or 'Callipygian Venus' and how the ancients had admired and revered the female ass. She said that certain rituals had been performed in the Temples of Venus and, although we had already shared some of them, there was more to learn. She offered to teach me. I readily accepted and began to learn the art of worship.

I studied hard and learned many ways that I could pamper and worship her and her awesome ass. 

 

There are exotic oils that should be used to massage both the mounds and the valley of a woman's ass. The full cheeks feel most adored when they can squeeze tightly on the face of an admirer and the 'Secret Flower of the Valley' will open if coaxed with licks and kisses and, on special occasions, may allow  'The Serpent of Ares' to enter.

 

After a month, she praised me for my efforts and asked if I would like to move in with her. Containing my glee, I said "Well, ok, I guess so, if you'll let me take you to dinner.'

 

I promised her we would dine at the hottest new Parisien sensation.

She agreed and even let me pick the dress she should wear. I purchased a sexy blue number with a plunging neckline and a flirty pleated bottom.  It was well worth

what I paid for the dress and the bribe that allowed us to jump ahead on the resturante's waiting list as I watched her savor and taste and sip every aspect of her dinner as though it were a sexual act. I had booked us a suite nearby and we strolled the short distance to the hotel holding hands.

 

As we entered our room she gave me that sweet superior smile and said.

"Mmm, thank you for dinner Bobby. That must have cost you plenty. It was very sweet and now I have something nice for you."

 

She turned with a slight little bend and looked over her shoulder. I knew what she wanted. I hurried beneath her skirt, nuzzled her cheeks and kissed her legs as she released her wind. I kissed the source of that breeze and remained beneath the stinky sexy tent of her skirt as she fingered herself to orgasm.

 

We then found our way to the bed where she kissed me and played her scarlet nails over my penis until it was near to bursting. She sat astride me and guided my

cock into what must be the sweetest place this side of heaven.

 

We have been together for almost a year now and are both very excited. A new Indian resturante just opened. It's only two blocks away and they deliver.       

 

We continue to work together and she often calls me into her office after she returns from lunch. She has developed quite a taste for spicy cuisine.

 

Last Friday she guided my face between her legs and, as I licked her, I felt a little trickle on my tongue. This was new. She had not only shared the recycled aroma of her Mexican lunch with me but a taste of her recycled beverage as well.

 

Much later that night, as we were cuddled in bed, I had to ask, "So, Avila, how many Margueritas did you have at your luncheon today?"

 

She kissed my face and said, "You're a clever boy, Bobby, and have developed a very discerning sense of taste."

"I really did not plan to piss in your mouth but I had held it in for a long time and would liked to have given you more." 

"Could you do that for me?"

"It would excite me very much if you would drink from me."

I was kissing all around her breasts as I answered.

"I adore you Avila."

 "I adore all of you."

 

She quickly changed her position and sat above my face.

She licked her lips and began to play with her perky nipples as she settled her sweet pussy on my mouth.

"Just suck gently, Bobby, and I'll try not to drown you."

 

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