Chapter Three: Sanity
Richard came out of the outhouse behind the cabin and walked back around
the cage toward the front of the cabin. He noticed Rose sobbing on the dirt
floor of the pen. He was almost motivated into concern for her, but thought
better of it. She was probably just trying to make him feel bad anyway. That
would be about right for her. She was a fucking manipulative bitch after all. It
would be right up her alley to make him feel shitty for carrying out a plan of
revenge on her.
Was what he was doing right? Aside from the obvious criminal aspect of
blackmailing and kidnapping someone, was what he was doing such a good idea? He
knew if he pulled this off right, she would be changed forever and would
probably come to accept the changes and him as part of a new life. If he didn't
do things right and she didn't accept the changes, well, then he didn't really
know what he would do. He couldn't very well let her go, could he? Not unless he
wanted to spend a large chunk of his life in prison.
Oh good grief, man, enough of this shit. The fact of the matter is
simple: She's an evil bitch that has caused the suffering of countless innocent
adolescents and he was here to dish out a heaping spoonful of justice. Fuck, not
justice, but good old fashioned revenge. Yes, it was wrong of him to do, but it
was being done none the less. If there were consequences and repercussions
later, he would approach them when they came.
He had walked around the cabin and was standing at the front door with
his hand on the latch. He wondered how long he had been standing there and then
he wondered if Rose had seen him standing here lost in thought. He heard her
sobbing in the cage off to his left, so he doubted very seriously that she had
paid any attention to him at all. That would be normal for her, after all,
wouldn't it?
He opened the door and went inside, sitting down at the table. He turned
the little radio back on and took out a deck of cards. He started playing
solitaire, trying not to think about the beautiful little animal out in his
cage. She was his now, after all, he could do what he wanted with her. Why not
use her as he wanted?
Ah fuck it, he thought. I have enough to think about without worrying
about whether or not to fuck her. I'll get around to it when the time is right.
Rose had stopped sobbing out side and was feeling terribly lonely. She
crawled about her cage and looked at the scenery. If the circumstances were
different, it would be beautiful here. The cabin was quiet and quaint and had a
rustic atmosphere about it. It was pleasant, truly, despite her not actually
being in it. The area was secluded and sequestered from the rest of the world,
which was nice for a private place and not so nice if you happened to be a
kidnap victim wanting desperately to be saved. The trees, mostly pines, oaks and
box elms, were all vibrant and green. The leaves had not yet started to turn,
but the first chill of the year would probably be upon them soon. Richard hadn't
waited very long to abduct her, although, to Richard, he had probably waited six
years too long to do it. The fall semester at school started in August and it
was only the second week of September now
A breeze rolled through the trees and the air became a little chiller.
Rose looked up to the sky and noticed clouds coming in. It looked like it was
going to rain. Surely, Richard wouldn't leave her out here once it rained. He
wouldn't do that to her, would he? She sighed and realized that, yes, he
probably would. He would do anything he damn well wanted with her and there
wasn't much she could do to stop him. A low rumble of thunder from far off
foretold even more clearly of rain.
Inside, Richard had laid down to read, content to let the animal outside
have some quiet time to itself. That would probably be one of the worst tortures
for her. Soon enough, he began to hear the little patters of raindrops on the
roof of the cabin. He put his book aside for a moment and went outside to have a
look. He walked out onto the porch as the rain started to come down. It wasn't a
heavy storm or anything, but it was a steady shower. Most of the thunder he
heard was far away from here, so he didn't figure there would be any threat to
the piggy by leaving her out here.
He walked to the end of the porch and looked into the cage at Rose. She
saw him and looked back. She was already drenched and her hair was clinging to
her neck and shoulders. She was hugging herself and shivering in the chilly
shower. Richard smiled at her and she dropped her head. She looked like a
helpless defeated prisoner.
Maybe he should bring her in and play with her awhile. No, not yet, he
decided. He would have time for that later. For now, he wanted her to be a
humiliated piece of shit. He wanted her to learn her place and how things were
going to run around here. He turned around and walked back into the cabin,
waiting for the rain to quit.
Rose looked after him and fresh tears sprung to her eyes. She actually
found herself wanting his attention. If he paid attention to her, it would at
least give her someone to talk to and to be around. She needed him. As much as
she hated to admit it, she really did. As long as she was locked in this cage,
she needed him. If he left her here, she would die. Rain showers might provide
her with water, but food would not find its own way to her. She would fight him
and she would resist him all she could, but she did need him. She had no idea
where she was. She was naked and locked in a collar. She shivered, partly from
the rain, but also partly because of the thought of being locked in a collar and
caged by a lowlife that should have barely deserved her attention in high
school. Rose didn't want to get back onto that tirade, so she let her mind drift
to other matters.
Eventually, the rain let up and then ceased altogether. It hadn't been
much of a shower, but it did get everything wet. Richard came out of the cabin
and walked to the cage housing his animal.
"How did you like the rain, piggy?" He asked her from under the porch.
"I'm cold." She replied, still shivering in her cage.
"You didn't answer me, though, piggy. How did you like the rain?"
"It was nice." Rose said, biting back her sharp remarks. "I liked the
sound of it most of all."
"Good. Would you like to come out for a walk?"
"Can I please?" Rose responded with interest. Anything to get the fuck out
of this cage! She screamed mentally.
"Oh. So you're learning to say please now? That's good of you, Rose. I
would prefer it if you learned your lessons quickly and behaved like a good
girl."
Had she said please? Rose asked herself. Holy shit, she did, didn't she?
She was just as surprised at this as Richard had been, maybe even more. She
remained silent, though, and didn't make a comment about it.
"Well, let's get you out of there, shall we?" Richard said and picked up
her leash from where he had tossed it on the rocking chair on his way into the
cabin earlier.
He walked to the cage and let her out, clipping the leash to her collar
and telling her to remain on her hands and knees and crawl behind him. He asked
her if she needed to pee again and she replied that she did, so he took her to
the area he had taken her to previously and let her relieve herself. He walked
her around the cabin, showing her where everything was. She had pretty much seen
it all already, except the outhouse. It wasn't just a simple outhouse either; it
was a well-built wood structure with a toilet and a bathtub. Richard explained
to Rose that they had running water from an artesian well under the cabin. They
didn't have hot water, but he had a big pot that could be heated over a fire and
poured into the tub, then cold water could be added to the right temperature.
There was even a septic system, so the toilet run-off didn't affect the
surrounding environment.
Rose really couldn't have given a shit less about the septic system or
artesian wells or any of it. The bathtub interested her, mostly because she was
cold and dirty and would have loved to have had a bath. The cabin was nice and
all, but it was definitely a far cry from the four and five star hotel services
she was used to when she travelled with her daddy.
She though about her daddy now and how far away he seemed now. She missed
him and wished she could be sitting in front of the big fireplace in the reading
room where daddy kept the nicest, softest chair in the whole house. She had, of
course, never actually touched any of the books in the reading room, but the
fireplace and the comfy chair were nice. Again, tears rolled down her cheeks.
She was becoming a regular cry baby out here. She wanted her family, though. She
wanted her regular life. She wanted to be shopping and driving around in her car
sipping frozen mocha cappuccinos with her best friends. She wanted to be free to
do what she fucking well wanted and when she wanted to do it. She didn't want to
be stuck at boring fucking college. She didn't want to be kidnapped by some
psycho freak from high school. She didn't want to be kept naked in a cage. She
damned sure didn't want to be pissing in the dirt and burying it.
She had made an angry noise sometime during her mental tirade and Richard
had noticed. He was taking her back to the porch, although she didn't notice.
She just crawled along, oblivious to most of the things going on around here,
even what Richard was saying. He led her up the steps of the porch and tied her
leash off to the railing as he had before. He sat down and looked at her. She
still hadn't looked up. She just stayed where she had been put with her head
looking at the ground lost in though.
"What are you thinking about, Rose?" Richard asked her calmly, but she
didn't seem to hear him.
"Rose!" He snapped. Her head jerked up and met his eyes, then dropped
again.
"I'm sorry." She said. "I was lost in thought for a moment. Please don't
hurt me."
"I'm not going to hurt you, Rose" Richard said, still looking at her.
"Contrary to your belief, it is not my desire to harm you in any way. I just
want to know what you are thinking about."
"I was thinking about my daddy." She said wiping a hand across her grimy,
tear stained face. "I miss him and being home."
Richard regarded her with interest and allowed her to continue.
"I miss my life, Richard. I miss driving with my friends and being home
with my daddy. I miss the fireplace in his reading room and his big, comfy
chair. I just want to go home and have a hot bath." She said, bringing fresh
tears.
Richard watched as she wept quietly. He said, "I know you miss those
things, Rose. One day you might have them again. Then again, one day you might
not want them anymore. I know it's hard to grasp right now, but I am trying to
show you what a regular life is like."
"By keeping me locked up in a cage?" She shot back at him with a fury that
surprised even her. As soon as the harsh words had come out of her mouth, she
recoiled, expecting to be struck.
"Yes, to an extent. I keep you in a cage to try to change the way you
think of things, Rose. I keep you naked and make you piss in a hole for the same
reason. I figure if I take enough away from you, you will eventually appreciate
what you are given and stop just expecting things to be handed to you on a
platter all the time."
"Why shouldn't I expect things to be handed to me, Richard? My fucking
family is wealthy. Don't you get it? We're the people that other people talk
about. I have the right to expect certain things because of whom I am and who my
daddy is. It's just the way things are." Rose said, now looking up at him, her
words inspiring her confidence.
"It's not the way things are, Rose. Not for the normal people. You're a
rich, egotistical bitch that just expects people to bend to your needs at the
drop of a hat. I'm not being insulting, Rose; I'm telling you the truth. Wait
until you have had everything possible taken away from you, then maybe you will
understand what I am talking about." Richard said, evenly. He wasn't angry with
what she said. He had grown to expect these sorts of responses from her.
"Screw that, Richard. That's what makes you and me different. You come
from the middles class 'backbone' of society and I come from the wealthy upper
crust. I shouldn't be punished for my genetics or for my parents. What you are
doing to me is wrong. I don't want to know what the normal people are like,
because I am not one of the normal people." Rose was starting to slip back into
her old form again. She could feel herself gathering power, readying for the
swift strike of the tongue that made her who she was.
"Frankly," she continued. "I find your reasons for all of this to be
flawed, if you are truly trying to show me the life of the normal people. Why
the fuck would you care? Who am I to you but someone from school?
"No, what I think is this, Richard: You're pissed at me because my friends
and the people that liked me in school picked on you and your chess club
groupies. We made fun of you and played little pranks on you. Well, fine and
dandy, people do it all the time. It's just part of growing up. Teenagers
torture one another.
"So now you've singled me out as the ringleader and expect me to pay for
my crimes against you and your form of humanity by showing me humility and
trying to teach me a lesson. Well go for it, little man, because, when it's all
said and done, I'll still be standing and you will be a stain on my daddy's two
thousand dollar shoes."
Richard sat and calmed himself. He hadn't expected this little rant from
her, or even from the likes of her. Truly, he was surprised by what he was
hearing. He didn't think she had enough brains to string all of those words
together.
"Well, you're right about some things, Rose." Richard said, keeping his
cool. "I did single you out as the ringleader and I do expect you to pay for
what you have done to my friends and me. And maybe my motivations aren't as
noble as I would have you think, but I do still expect you to learn something
from our time together. And if it does work out to where you get back to your
father, you can be sure I won't be around to have him crushing me under his heel
like he does to so many other people.
"You don't intimidate me anymore, Rose. You stopped having that power a
long, long time ago. Now, you pretty much just piss me off. You hurt me for six
years. You hurt my friends, too. Out of all the popular people in our school,
you were number one. You had the power to decide who did what to whom, but you
chose to be petty and trite to those you felt were beneath you. That's the part
I want to change about you; the part I want to show you about yourself that can
be different, because now you are beneath me, slut, and you will be until I
choose otherwise.
"All that power you had in school doesn't mean squat now. All of your
daddy's money can't buy you back from me. And not one of your friends can help
you now. You belong to me now and you will continue to belong to me until such
time as I deem fit to change that."
"I don't belong to anything, you son of a bitch!" Rose screamed at him.
His words had finally struck a cord with her. "You do not own me! You never
will! If you think I am going to just bend to your will, then you better think
again, buddy, because I don't think so. You don't have the stones to..."
He slapped her hard across the face, knocking her back on her ass. The
leash was pulled snug against the railing and her collar as she fell backwards.
He stood up and put his foot against her chest and pushed down. This caused the
collar to ride up higher on her throat and dig into the skin there. It also cut
off her airway, making it impossible for her to draw a breath.
"Well, Rose, if you're not going to learn anything from your time here, I
can always cut it short for you." He said, looking down at her, his eyes focused
and intense. "What do you think?"
She futilely tried to push his foot off of her chest, but she was not
nearly strong enough to move him. She tried to gasp for breath, but none was
coming. She scratched at his leg and boot, but she was too weak to harm him. She
was now afraid, more truly afraid than she had ever been in her entire life. As
her lungs burned for air, she suddenly knew what it was to be helpless. To be
powerless against someone, unable to stop them from doing whatever they wanted.
A sheer bolt of white revelation struck through Rose's entire being as she
suddenly realized that this was how it felt to be beneath someone; to be really,
honestly beneath someone. Was this how Richard had felt all throughout his
school years? Was this what he meant when he said everyday for him had been
torture? Was this the effect she had had upon him?
God, she needed to breathe, but he wasn't letting up. She could see little
stars at the corners of her eyes and felt a throbbing in her head. She knew she
must be close to passing out by now. She tried feebly to raise her arm to do
something, anything to make him stop, but it was no use. All she could manage
was to reach up and grab the leg of his faded blue jeans in a pathetic gesture
of defiance.
If she could speak, she would beg him to stop, her fear driving her. She
would plead with him to take his foot off. She would tell him she would do
anything for him if he would just let her have some air. Couldn't he see that?
Couldn't he tell by just looking at her that she was pleading with him in her
mind? Please, Richard, please let me have some air. I'll do anything you want,
just let me breathe again. I'll piss in the dirt, I'll let you call me piggy,
and I won't put up a fight if you just let me breathe. Please...
Her vision was fading. She could see the darkness overcoming her eyes. Was
this what it was like to die, she wondered. Would he kill her, really?
Then, suddenly, it all stopped. The pressure was released from her chest
and she was finally able to suck in one deep gasp of air. She choked
immediately, but at least she could breathe again. Oh god, she was so thankful
just for that simple pleasure, just for the simple need to draw air.
Richard sat back down as Rose choked and sought to regain her breath. He
watched her chest heave and he watched as she sat up, her hair in strands across
her sweating face. He sat and waited for her to recover from the oxygen
deprivation before he spoke again. He wanted her complete attention.
She looked up at his face, tears in her eyes. The look was complete fear,
horror. He knew it would be a blow to her and that's what he wanted: Something
to finally get his point across.
"Do you understand me now, Rose?" He asked patiently.
"Yes." She replied weakly and broke into ragged sobs and heavy tears. Her
chest heaved as she wept. It was the saddest sound Richard could ever remember
hearing. Maybe he was finally getting through to her. Maybe she was just so
utterly terrified of him now that she would say what she thought he wanted to
hear just so he wouldn't hurt her anymore. He hoped not. He didn't want this to
be a lesson in fear; he wanted it to be a lesson in humility and understanding.
He left her there, crying on the front porch, and went inside to start
dinner. He left the door open, so he could listen to her. He wanted to hear when
she stopped crying. He wanted to talk to her again to see if he was getting
through to her or if he was just frightening her. So, he cooked and waited
patiently.
Rose sobbed for several minutes. Something had happened inside her. She
wasn't quite sure what it was yet, but something had happened. Maybe it was
feeling so near death. Maybe it was the first time she had ever felt completely
helpless. Maybe it was because she was finally starting to understand Richard a
little better. Perhaps it was just some of all of those reasons; she really
didn't know and really didn't want to think about it. She didn't really have a
choice, though, did she? That's what he had brought her here to do, wasn't it?
He was trying to make her think about these things and see herself and the rest
of the world in a new light.
Was she truly as bad as he said she was? She had always thought of herself
as perfectly normal. In fact, she usually thought of herself more perfect than
normal. She guessed Richard would have bad things to say about that, though.
She heard him cooking inside. She wondered what he was making. It smelled
good. She smelled biscuits and something else, maybe chicken. After several long
moments, the sounds of cooking stopped and she saw him through the open doorway
taking a plate of food to the little table and eating. So, he ate first and then
fed her from the scraps, like a pet. Why should it be different? She guessed
that he probably saw her as a pet or some kind of animal to be trained properly.
She noticed him finish eating after a few more minutes. She watched him walk to
the stove and gather bones and morsels on the plate he had just used. He walked
outside to her and set the plate down on the seat of the rocking chair. He
untied her leash from the porch railing and took it in his hand. He picked the
plate back up and walked her to her cage. He opened the door for her and she
crawled in. She turned around and faced him and he unhooked the leash from the
collar. He scraped the food from the plate into one of the dishes on the floor
of her cage and then closed the cage door and locked it. He turned and walked
back inside the cabin. Shortly, Rose heard water running from inside. She
figured he was washing the dirty dishes.
She looked to her little tin dish and saw he had put one whole drumstick
and half a breast in her dish. Also in the dish but sort of mixed all together
were cooked canned corn and canned peas. He had also given her two biscuits.
This was practically a feast to her. It was definitely more than she ate in one
sitting on any given day. She was unsure of her ability to finish it all.
However, as she began to eat, she realized she was a lot hungrier than she
though she was and before she knew it, she was licking the juice of the chicken
off her fingers and tilting the dish to her mouth and scraping the last pea into
her open mouth.
"Finished?" Richard asked from the corner of the porch.
Rose jumped, quite startled. She hadn't seen him standing there and was
too caught up in her eating to hear him.
"Yes, I'm finished." She said and even managed a little smile.
"Good." He said. "I gave you extra because I think you're too skinny. You
need some more meat on your bones."
Rose flushed and was quite put off by this remark. She had worked long and
hard to get her body into the shape it was in. She did all the exercises in the
magazines and followed a strict diet. She thought she looked fine. Actually, she
thought she looked hot. What did he know anyway?
"I know what you're thinking, Rose." Richard said, looking her body over
slowly. "You're thinking that it took a lot of effort to get yourself into shape
and to be thin like you are. Well, I prefer a healthier look from my girls. I
don't like to see ribs and hipbones sticking out. It's not very attractive.
"So from now on I'm going to include a few more calories and more fat in
your diet than you're used to. That is, if you are good. I don't want you to
expect that you will just be fed. Food and many other privileges will have to be
earned if you want them."
"Privileges like what?" She asked. She was feeling a little confused. She
hadn't ever had privileges before, at least not that she knew of anyway.
"Let's see." He said thoughtfully, looking up at the late afternoon sky.
"I'm talking about washroom breaks, eating, and freedom of movement. Those sorts
of privileges are what I mean."
"So what you're saying is that if I'm not good and do what you want me to
do, you will take away my food or lock me in the cage all day? Is that what you
mean?" She asked, regarding him.
"Yes, that's exactly what I mean, Rose." He replied, thinking that he was
starting to get through to her.
"That's just not fair!" She exclaimed. "How can you take those things away
from me? Am I just supposed to not eat? Are you just going to starve me to
death? How are you going to keep me from going to the washroom? I mean, it's
kind of a reflex action, you know? When you have to go, you have to go. About
the only real privilege I see that you listed was letting me out of the cage. I
can see how that would be considered a privilege and if you didn't let me out of
the cage, it would probably drive me pretty nuts. Those other things, though,
those aren't privileges. They're things that I have to do in order to survive."
"Well, they are privileges now. They are privileges that I can and will
take away from you. If I were you, I would be a good girl and not try my
patience."
Yeah, we'll see, you freak, Rose thought. It seemed that the food and the
appalling conversation had snapped Rose out of the reflective stupor she had
found herself in after Richard had choked here nearly to death. She doubted he
would try to do it again anyway, so she was less than worried about it.
"I think that's enough for today, Rose. I'll leave you to yourself for the
evening. Have a good night." Richard said and rose to return to the cabin.
He went inside and lit the lantern, busying himself for the rest of the
evening and not giving so much as a second thought to Rose in her little cage
outside.
Rose sat on the floor of the cage with her back against the chain link
fencing and watched the sun go down. She though about the day and how different
her life had become in so short a time. Whether or not Richard had good points
was irrelevant to her at this moment. She had to resist him. She had to resist
him for her own sanity. She couldn't just let him bulldoze her and twist her
into something she knew she wasn't.
He might beat her. He might break her spirit. He might hurt her. But she
was determined not to let him take over her being. She resolved herself to
resist his influence. She would start tomorrow.
