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Songs of the Dance
Author: Archetype
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(Added on Oct 26, 2002)
(This month 63687 readers) (Total 111670 readers) |
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A young girl with large breasts is kidnapped and trained to be a slave by a wealthy older man. Slow buildup to some intense scenes, and even a bit of romance. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 9 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (9/10) |
| Average
Rating: (9/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Mothbrad
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Dec 25, 2006 |
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A great story - well written, as others have said, and very exciting. I don't know what impact it would have had if I'd read it before its sequel, but it worked well anyway. Hopefully we don't have to wait another four years for your next story! (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
littleone_
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 19, 2006 |
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I almost never give a story a perfect 10, but if this one doesn't deserve it none too. First off it is a very credible, believable story. Second it magnificently sexy, at least to me, (hehehe). My only suggestion would be have have a bit more of the girls thoughts and feeling directly portrayed rather then the story by told by narration and through the eyes of her captors. But then it may be that Achetype may not be comfortable telling a story from a girls point of view; or the point of view of a captured, dominated and humiliated girl. But whatever, this is an amazing story and a great read.
I just read Chapter 3. Meet the Master and I take back what I said about more from the girls mind. I could feel everything Mandy was feeling. Her pain was my pain, her humiliation was my humiliation. I could feel The Master taking me in my mouth and my butt. It was a great, marvelous, wonderful. And you know like it was so totally awesome to have Archetype just so fully lay out what was going inside the Master's head too. I've never so like been able to grasp the thoughts of a Master like this before. It was totally amazing. Thanks Master Archetype, Sir; you are a totally great writer. I hope to be able be able to read lots and lots more of your stuff. Huggles and kisses. (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
Carmaloo
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Sep 14, 2005 |
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Great, great read. The slow pace is unlike most (all?) stories here but I really enjoy it. One good scene, well written, is better than five in a row that are poorly done.
I notice this story is qhite old and there is no sign yet of the sequel you promised. Will we see it? (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
trainman
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 17, 2004 |
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What a wonderful read. Getting into both the mind and body of Mandy was a good asset to the storyline. Great descriptions and humiliations had me wanting more at the end. I hope that you will write the sequel where Mandy and her Master capture another. (10/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 10, 2004 |
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great (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
jeanne
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 7, 2004 |
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Excellent writing, good storyline. (ie not a convoluted one!). I regret that the lady is not completely shaved - I object to pussy mustaches, on slaves anyway - and I definitely did not understand the part where the girl is supposed to push her tits through her fingers. Looks and feels very erotic, but I was at a loss to visualize it! A common side effect of inventive S/M play in fiction: sometimes it calls for engineering acumen from the writer and the reader! Whereas the mechanics of vanilla sex are universal. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
redEva
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 3, 2003 |
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WOW now this really is nice story (i personally could do with a bit less pain :) but than again that is only my personal preference) great, exploration of the psychological aspect of domination. Another point I have to congratulate you on, is the fact that poor Mandy does not keep cuming during the séances of extreme pain punishment – thank you. (9/10)
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| Reviewer:
Moggy
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 31, 2002 |
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Good quality of writing and an interesting background. I thought the erotic scene went on a little too long, and consequently lost some impact. I would have preferred to see the plot and characters developed more, particularly as you have created a good scenario for a story. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
rainee
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Oct 28, 2002 |
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Very well written and an enjoyable read.Good story-line and character definition at the beginning. Two or three more chapters written as well as those already on site, and my rating would easily have been a 9+...Hope to see more of this story in the near future. (8/10)
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- Replied by:
archetype
(Edit) (Nov 14, 2002)
- Thanks for all the comments. This is my first attempt at this kind of writing and it is great to be able to see how many people are reading the story.
For those of you who did not like the ending, I'm working on a sequel. Let me know what you would like poor Mandy to experience next.
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