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Raping Jacelyn
Author: LaJan
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(Added on Feb 27, 2004)
(This month 9566 readers) (Total 25509 readers) |
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The true stort of a chance encounter from the imagined POV of the attacker... |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 3 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (5.5/10) |
| Average
Rating: (5.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (6/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (5/10) |
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 11, 2004 |
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nothing spectacular (6/10)
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- Replied by:
LaJan
(Edit) (Apr 12, 2004)
- (sigh) Hopefully, what you meant was my telling of the story wasn't spectacular. Since the story is true, it sure was "spectacular" to the victim...
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| Reviewer:
teamster
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 7, 2004 |
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although the writing could use some polishing up, i like the way you tried to capure the characters emotions, however repellant his actions might be. although i personally have participated in many bdsm relationships, it was always with the full knowledge and consent of my partners. rape is still a crime, and rightly so. (5/10)
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- Replied by:
LaJan
(Edit) (Mar 7, 2004)
- Thank you for you vote and your review. (I happen to have been a Teamster for the past 15 years as well)!
I'm fairly sure you read the review from another reader and my response below. If I am mistaken, please read them both. I believe they show the reason for the story, the reason for the crime's being related in a story for in this forum, and how I feel about feel about the way this story was written. But, for the life of me I can't understand why this particular story is generating such confusion. Of course, rape is a crime and this story is about a very real crime that was committed upon a friend of mine. Since this is not a work of fiction (regarding the commission of a crime), I thought it was a "given" that it would be read as such. However, even with my explanation under the title, "The true story of a chance encounter from the imagined POV of the attacker...” it appears that some people are seeing my writing of this story as some sort of endorsement of the crime of rape. If anyone gets that impression, I am mystified as to why but I am also truly apologetic. To date, 10167 have read the story and the only responses I have received so far are in regards to crime, and not the actual story but how well or badly it was written! While I fully appreciate ALL responses to anything I do, the responses this story is generating brand new for me on this site. In fact, since EVERY story I have posted here falls into the "non-consent" category, I would have expected these sorts of responses fairly consistently if they were the common feelings of the readers here. And if that were so, submitting them here would have been something I would have reconsidered immediately.
To be perfectly honest, I find bdsm relationships to be much more graphically violent than most rape stories I've read here. And none of mine have or will ever include torture - "...with [or without] the full knowledge and consent of [the characters]".
I will never begrudge anyone the right to have whatever type of relationship they choose to have, including bdsm lifestyles. I will NEVER condone the crime of rape in any way shape or form. But I believed I was being very clear in the fact that this is a true story about an actual crime; the only thing that isn't known is the POV of the attacker. Even some of that was painfully obvious as he told his victim many of the lines I quoted verbatim.
Teamster, whatever you do, please don't read any of my other work posted here if this one offends you. If you'd like information regarding many more of my short stories (none of which involve rape, or even violence), I will gladly either offer it to you or send you samples. But the last thing I'd want is to upset you or any of the other 10166 readers who have "hit" this story
Peace.
LaJan
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 2, 2004 |
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The author can certainly write. The proofing and editing could be improved. The character development and background covered all the bases. Unfortunately there does not seem much justification for the actions of the protagonist who turns into a serial rapist. To this reader this is a major flaw. The description of his first rape is presented warts and all. Most of the writing here is good. Too bad it has to be used to describe a most distasteful activity. I also had a real problem with the rapist's view of his victim as just a piece of meat to be used and abused for his pleasure. (5/10)
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- Replied by:
LaJan
(Edit) (Mar 6, 2004)
- Thank you very much for your review. I appreciate your appreciation of my writing skills, as I have had absolutely no formal training.
I agree with your assessment regarding many of your issues. First, the justification for the "protagonist" (and it's pretty distasteful to call the main male character "pro" anything, isn't it?) is rather weak since there was precious little information I was given to work with.
Regarding the rest of your comments, I must agree with all of them as well. The subject can be seen as extremely unpleasant for all concerned, including the reader. However, the entire story is true so the need for me to remain faithful to the events was mandatory since the female who experienced the rape commissioned the story. This stipulation also speaks to your accurate line: "...real problem[s] with the rapist's view of his victim as just a piece of meat to be used and abused for his pleasure". This story is true so the male character was reported as telling his honest and real feelings towards his victim. It's a pity that ANYONE would treat another individual with such callous distain but the story's accuracy demanded the telling of his tale as he told it.
I am a bit shocked that my editing was so shoddy, though. I used "intelligent" programs to correct any typos, grammar and punctuation errors. Obviously they all failed miserably. I will personally review the "computer-edited" final drafts from now on. Thanks for mentioning the oversight.
Once again, I thank you for reading my work and I especially appreciate your taking the time to comment on it.
Peace.
LaJan
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