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Tami's Secret Life
Author: Angel Dawn
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(Added on Feb 27, 2004)
(This month 11390 readers) (Total 27899 readers) |
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Tami Secretly live a life of Incest and pleasure a group called the Cell is in control of what Tami conciders her life... |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (5.5/10) |
| Average
Rating: (5.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (8/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (3/10) |
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 7, 2012 |
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A good story which is let down by the way it is told/written.
Not every writer is a natural, so Angel Dawn will have a bit of a struggle at first.
Key point is to have a synonym dictionary at hand and secondly, reread every sentence you have written at least twice, to make sure that the last sentence continues the story and isn't a full or partly repetition of the sentence that came before.
I liked what I read, but as stated before, Angel Dawn will need a bit of practice to hone her talent.
JJ
(6/10)
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| Reviewer:
jip
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 21, 2006 |
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Special exiting story. Appreciated it. Amazing that some readers seem only to be interested in gramtical errors or typing mistakes. Enjoy first the story, that is the main purpose I think (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
longrover
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 13, 2004 |
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Angel Dawn continues to explore difficult situations with characters whose reactions are not always predictable. Tami's relationship with her parents was complex. She loved them, hated and feared what they required of her, and complied with their wishes as best she could. Sounds like lots of 17 year olds to me. I was surprised by the group's tolerance of Mr. Dean, her father's reaction to her decision at the end of her visit and by her mother's acceptance of the events her husband orchestrated. Grammar continues to be a problem, but the plot and characters are better developed than those in "The Friend" or "Sidebar." I hope Angel Dawn revises the posted stories along the lines several reviewers suggests and continues to post new stories. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
teamster
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 7, 2004 |
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too many mistakes in spelling and grammar. your character seems devoid of an inner life. for someone who dreads coming home for these vacations she seems entirely too docile and agreeable. (3/10)
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- Replied by:
Angel_Dawn
(Edit) (Mar 7, 2004)
- Seems to me you have never been in a situation in which you felt you had no control. After years of having very little say over ones life a person tends to follow through with what is expected....regaurdless of their own feelings of self-preservation. I appreciate your candor and sincerely hope you can at some point in the future enjoy my writing as it improves with helpful and guided words of encouragement.
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| Reviewer:
annasherwood
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 2, 2004 |
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although not an altogether original idea, the premise is stimulating and promising, but not fulfilled by the writing; there are so many grammatical/spelling errors that it detracts from the story...improved proof-reading and generally a better flow to the story would improve it immensely and help bring it to it's original promise... (4/10)
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 27, 2004 |
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As near as I can figure, this one started out as a prequel to The Stepford Wives or perhaps a variation on The Thantos Tale series. It is bizarre, somewhat interesting, generates a fairly high degree of heat at times, but suffers from poor editing, is at times incomprehensible, tends to repeat itself and the author evidently never heard of the comma, a useful device for pacing, separating thoughts and enabling reading to be a pleasure rather than a trial. (4/10)
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