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Prescription for Pain
Author: mesbesh
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(Added on Jun 18, 2005)
(This month 41406 readers) (Total 77921 readers) |
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Awfully violent story of a lesbian female serial killer. The villainess tortures and kills young women using them in all possible ways she can imagine. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (7.5/10) |
| Average
Rating: (7.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (8/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Mothbrad
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 25, 2007 |
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I very much enjoyed this story - the lesbian serial killer angle might not exactly be original, but it is at least not as overplayed as some other plot devices. On the plus side - I loved the use of language by the sadistic bitch, as dirty talk always does it for me. On the down side, there was not enough attention paid to the feelings of the victim, other than the obvious (she's in pain and terrified, etc). It would have been a hotter story if there was a bit of time given over to Barbie's response to each new atrocity. Otherwise, a fine read that does not overstay its welcome. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
LordVetinari
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 25, 2005 |
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Very heavy. A good read. (8/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 20, 2005 |
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lex said it best in his review, no need to repeat what was said (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
mike uk reader
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 19, 2005 |
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Well I see one of this site's long-standing authors "Lex Ludite" has reviewed your story in his usual manner and perhaps for the first time it's hard for me to disagree with him although
I do consider you should continue with this delicious story and if this should be your first effort I am very impressed. Please don't disappear into webland like some author's have done let's have more chapters very soon.
(8/10)
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- Replied by:
mesbesh
(Edit) (Jun 19, 2005)
- Thanks for your feedback both of you. This was a collection of unrelated extreme ideas jotted down and then attempting to string them together. Was not really written for outside consumption, so my next attempt should be more coherent, and I will no doubt proof read it before hand.
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| Reviewer:
Dododecapod
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 19, 2005 |
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Ouch! Mind control, degradation AND extreme torture! I think I'm in love...
The doctor seems oddly chipper, a bit strange, but then so is what she's doing. And your writing is quite good (though a thorough spellcheck wouldn't hurt). I'm very impressed. (7/10)
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- Replied by:
mesbesh
(Edit) (Jun 19, 2005)
- Thank you for the feedback. I will be more attentive to the misspellings, grammatical errors and overall flow in the future.
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 18, 2005 |
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Details and distractions detracted from my total enjoyment of your over the top effort. Here are a few examples of distractions; breeched instead of breached, your instead of you're, obvious instead of apparent (Can't blame that one on spell check), sudzed instead of sudsed, Br instead of Dr, Books instead of Brooks, etc,,etc,
As for details, how about the disappearing panties that reappear in Barbara's mouth? How about the complete lack of any explanation for how this magic pain machine worked, or how the electrodes were attached to the victim's temples? What kind of medical mumbo jumbo did the good doctor have to apply to keep Barbara alive during, let alone after the double mastectomy? How do you explain the mind control that Brooks had over her victim?
All these unanswered questions got in the way of this reader's total enjoyment of this Grand Guignol exercise.
Be advised that I normally don't go into such excruciating detail unless I believe that the author has enough talent to benefit from it. I'll be keeping my eye out for further work from you. The site could benefit from a few more authors who are capable of writing coherent sentences back to back. (7/10)
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- Replied by:
mesbesh
(Edit) (Jun 19, 2005)
- Very helpfull review, thank you. Will promise to proof read and pay more attention to details next time.
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