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The Crimson Bikini
Author: Size Matters
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(Added on Jan 8, 2012)
(This month 13583 readers) (Total 33487 readers) |
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A story of the Loving relationship between a Mistress and Her nubile slave girl Amber |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 3 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (7/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (8/10) |
| Lowest
Rating: (7/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Free Master
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 11, 2012 |
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The story is short, but it provides a snippet into a very deep love relationship between a slave and her mistress. I greatly enjoyed the romance and the blissfulness of both character's orgasms. Nothing to me is more beautiful than to see a lover gasping for air as her body releases the tensions and liquids during a very hard cum.
I am REALLY annoyed with the quotation/Question marks in the prose? Why does it happen to some, and not to others? This is a very nagging problem, that I don't believe is the author, but is the webmaster's issue (I could be wrong about that). If the strange punctuation is the author's fault (not just Size), the webmaster should explain how this is happening so other writers can avoid the problem. If it is the webmaster, it needs to be fixed ASAP. The sooner it is fixed, the more enjoyable the stories. (8/10)
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- Replied by:
Size Matters
(Edit) (Jan 11, 2012)
- Thank you Free Master, for taking the time to reveiw my first attempt at erotica. I must apologize for the formatting, you are absolutely correct. I have submitted a revised version with proper dialog spacing and a request to the webmaster to ensure the quoation marks remain intact. I hope to have another Amber/Mistress entry with more blissful orgasms.
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| Reviewer:
Alix
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 10, 2012 |
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As Jimmy said, the formatting, the little sqaures made it so hard to read. (7/10)
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- Replied by:
Size Matters
(Edit) (Jan 11, 2012)
- Thank you Alix, for taking the time to reveiw my first attempt at erotica. I must apologize for the formatting, JJ is absolutely correct. I have submitted a revised version with proper dialog spacing and a request to the webmaster to ensure the quoation marks remain intact. I hope to have another Amber/Mistress entry that will fill out their "bigger picture".
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 9, 2012 |
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Size Matters doesn't seem to care about size, hence this rather short entry.
An entry which suffers quite a bit from poor formatting: dialogue from different persons should be started at a new alinea for each instead of cramming everything on one line/straight after one another.
Part of the unfortunate formatting is also to blame on the site's rather goofy way in treating committed texts -doing away with quotation marks et all.
"The Crimson Bikini" is a decent effort, yet again not a real story but rather an outtake of some people's lives.
As such, it would be interesting to get a "bigger picture", i.e. to get to know Mistress and Amber a tad better through other excerpts, because, due to its shortness, "The Crimson Bikini" leaves the reader on his/her hunger...
JJ (7/10)
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- Replied by:
Size Matters
(Edit) (Jan 11, 2012)
- Thank you JJ, for taking the time to reveiw my first attempt at erotica. I must apologize for the formatting, you are absolutely correct. I have submitted a revised version with proper dialog spacing and a request to the webmaster to ensure the quoation marks remain intact. I hope to have another Amber/Mistress entry that will fill out their "bigger picture".
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